Wow! I hadn't realized that it had been almost 2 months since my last posting!
I have to say that I somehow found my loving feeling again for running. Maybe because we abolished the tank trail and added the Beautiful Greenbelt instead. Maybe I pulled my head out of my third point of contact.
Either way I have actually come a long way since July.
Last week I attended the Pocatello Marathon, and completed my very first 10K. My official time was 1:11:30.18. My goal was to run it under 1:15, and I did!! I finished and that's the best part!
Today I ran 7 miles, much slower than last week but it was much hillier course.
I'm working on that Half Marathon that is about 5 weeks away. I'm super duper nervous about it, but I have no time goal, I just want to finish!
My weight on the other hand I haven't had under control. I managed to go about a month and a half without weighing myself. Last week was the first time and I was at 214, this week 216.
Harumph! I know I went seriously crazy this summer baking, because I really hadn't done much in the spring. I ate really crappy on the weekends, but generally good on the weekdays.
I have abolished most of the crap about 3 weeks ago, because I have another military weigh in looming in about 4 weeks. FML!!! I know I'll pass my PT test but that weight thing is just a pain in the arse.
I feel happy and healthy, and I wish that was the most important right now. But I have to please the standard, and that's making me unhappy and stressed.
Wish me luck, hopefully I will check back before the half.
Friday, September 7, 2012
Thursday, July 26, 2012
I've Lost That Loving Feeling
When I think about running I think about the scene from Top Gun when Tom Cruise sings You've Lost that Loving Feeling.
I still like running to some degree, but my love of sleeping is overpowering that love of running feeling.
I find myself loving the fact that I have someone to run with on Tuesdays and Thursdays, even though we are hit and miss and are not always consistent. But I hate where we run. It's this hilly Tank Trail by the base I work at, and it's just hard. We run it for a reason, because it will help train for the City of Trees Half Marathon, which is a pretty hilly run.
I'm basically being a big fat whiney butt lately. I have a lot of stress in my life right now, and you would think going running would help, but lately I feel like curling into a tiny ball on my bed and just not going anywhere.
I need to find that euphoric feeling, especially since it's not really a chore anymore, like it was before trying to make military standards. I figured once I reached that point where I didn't have to worry about getting booted out of the military, that it would be easy. But no, I seem to have fallen back into the rut where I make military weight, then I don't, stress about not making it... back and forth.
I CAN'T DO THIS ANYMORE!
I have to set a good example and not be that fat, lazy NCO. The fat, lazy Mom.
I just need to add more hours in my day to fit everything in....
Thanks for letting me complain.
I still like running to some degree, but my love of sleeping is overpowering that love of running feeling.
I find myself loving the fact that I have someone to run with on Tuesdays and Thursdays, even though we are hit and miss and are not always consistent. But I hate where we run. It's this hilly Tank Trail by the base I work at, and it's just hard. We run it for a reason, because it will help train for the City of Trees Half Marathon, which is a pretty hilly run.
I'm basically being a big fat whiney butt lately. I have a lot of stress in my life right now, and you would think going running would help, but lately I feel like curling into a tiny ball on my bed and just not going anywhere.
I need to find that euphoric feeling, especially since it's not really a chore anymore, like it was before trying to make military standards. I figured once I reached that point where I didn't have to worry about getting booted out of the military, that it would be easy. But no, I seem to have fallen back into the rut where I make military weight, then I don't, stress about not making it... back and forth.
I CAN'T DO THIS ANYMORE!
I have to set a good example and not be that fat, lazy NCO. The fat, lazy Mom.
I just need to add more hours in my day to fit everything in....
Thanks for letting me complain.
Tuesday, July 10, 2012
Avoiding the Scale
My jump back into working out has turned into just dipping my toes in.
I've only run a handful of times since I got done with Annual Training. Weird schedules, vacations, and holidays have just made it weird for me.
I'm also slightly unmotivated.
I signed up for the Pocatello Gap 10K on the 1st to hopefully put some giddy-up in my hitch with running. I have a plan for both the 10K and the Half Marathon. I keep telling myself, I've put the money forward I have to complete this.
I have decided to avoid the scale for a couple of months because I keep fluctuating between 208-213, and it's just discouraging. I'm having the hubby hide the scale until September, so that I don't dwell on that number. I hope to let it refocus my train of thought and so I don't get discouraged.
I'm still determined to lose another 10-15 lbs by Cole's 2nd birthday in October, and it's very attainable if I can just get my butt in gear.
I'm just going to keep on trucking.
I've only run a handful of times since I got done with Annual Training. Weird schedules, vacations, and holidays have just made it weird for me.
I'm also slightly unmotivated.
I signed up for the Pocatello Gap 10K on the 1st to hopefully put some giddy-up in my hitch with running. I have a plan for both the 10K and the Half Marathon. I keep telling myself, I've put the money forward I have to complete this.
I have decided to avoid the scale for a couple of months because I keep fluctuating between 208-213, and it's just discouraging. I'm having the hubby hide the scale until September, so that I don't dwell on that number. I hope to let it refocus my train of thought and so I don't get discouraged.
I'm still determined to lose another 10-15 lbs by Cole's 2nd birthday in October, and it's very attainable if I can just get my butt in gear.
I'm just going to keep on trucking.
Tuesday, June 19, 2012
I'M BAAAAAACKKK!!
I am always telling myself things to keep me motivated, and ^ is definitely my favorite.
Whew!!! 209.2!!! I am steady at my weight!!
I'm back, and with a workout plan this time!! Run at least 3 times a week, nightly walks, and insanity 4 times a week.
Weigh-ins will be on Tuesdays, because I think it will just work better. Sadly I have more time to blog at work than at home, so since I don't work Sat-Monday, Tuesdays work better.
It was rough running this morning, I admit to walking a few times, especially after a couple of the hilly parts on the tank trail. I was really happy that I did it, and realized how much I like zoning out to the music and forgetting my troubles.
Best part was my new running shoes. I went to Shu's and I had a 3D print of my feet done to determine the best shoes. Apparently my right foot is bigger than my left, and I tend to overpronate. So the gal hooked me up with shoes that manages my stability, and even made me run around outside the store to test them out. The worked beautifully this morning.
There is just something about a new pair of running shoes!! :)
Hope you didn't miss me to much!!
Cheers to keeping it up!!
Friday, May 25, 2012
Hitting Pause
Since I finished the semester by working out has been intermittent with only running 3 times a week.
Why???
A few reasons:
1) I can't drag my butt out of bed in the morning (I'm finally getting 8 hours of sleep!)
2) By the time I get home all I want to do is play with my lil man (have you seen his face! hard to resist!)
3) I just want to take a break.
Research shows that if you change up your workout/diet plan, your body reacts by losing weight. This also includes taking a break every once in awhile.
I have my 2 week military training coming up starting 2June, so my normal schedule will be non-existent anyways. There will be a lot going on and I'm not sure if and when I will get workout time in.
I have decided that I will take a break from everything until 18June.
I will still continue to not eat like a pig, believe it or not I have learned good eating habits. The hubby and I still walk 1-1.5 miles every night (except Saturdays). I hate Army chow so that will help! I'm not a complete blob, but I just need to give my body a break.
Yes, I have realized that getting back into everything will almost be like I'm starting over again. No matter how fit you are, you take a break and you feel like dying when you go back.
I have not forgotten the things that I have learned. I never will, I will not go back to being a blimp.
I've learned how to maintain, so I'm just mastering the art for the next few weeks.
See you in a few weeks!!! Keep on keeping on!
Tuesday, May 22, 2012
Pre-Pregnancy Uniform
My most exciting news I have, is that I now officially fit back into my military uniform that I wore before I got pregnant.
I have been contemplating the idea of trying them on for the last couple of months, but I just couldn't bring myself to do it, for fear of disappointment.
Was in a grumpy mood yesterday so I deep cleaned parts of the house, as is my usual when in a grumpy mood, and I hit our closet yesterday. Lo and behold there was a pair of my pants lying on top of a big pile of clothes.
To try, or not to try on was my dilemma.
I tried them on and Viola! They fit!! I was sooooo super excited.
On other weekend news, I ran my 3rd 5K this weekend!! I'm not entirely sure what my accurate time is. The time on the website of the YMCA says 31:14, which placed me at 7th out of 43 women my age.
Mapmyrun.com says I actually ran 3.53 in 33:15. Meaning I met my goal of running a 3.1 in under 30 minutes...
Meh, I will go with the official time. Still pretty good in my book. Plus, did you see SEVENTH OUT OF 43!! Pretty good eh???
Last note for this week. I couldn't get my lazy butt out of bed this weekend, and I'm not sure how the next two weeks are going to go before I start AT. I think I'm trying to cram in extra sleep I've lost over the last two semester's and the sleep I'll lose during AT.
I keep telling myself I HAVE to get into high gear again if I want to lose another 10-15 lbs by Cole's birthday, and run that half marathon.
I know I can, I know I can, just need to give myself a break.
I was asked for a picture, not a fan of me in uniform because I always feel fluffier (Dan hates it when I call myself fat, so fluffy is a term he enjoys better).
I have been contemplating the idea of trying them on for the last couple of months, but I just couldn't bring myself to do it, for fear of disappointment.
Was in a grumpy mood yesterday so I deep cleaned parts of the house, as is my usual when in a grumpy mood, and I hit our closet yesterday. Lo and behold there was a pair of my pants lying on top of a big pile of clothes.
To try, or not to try on was my dilemma.
I tried them on and Viola! They fit!! I was sooooo super excited.
On other weekend news, I ran my 3rd 5K this weekend!! I'm not entirely sure what my accurate time is. The time on the website of the YMCA says 31:14, which placed me at 7th out of 43 women my age.
Mapmyrun.com says I actually ran 3.53 in 33:15. Meaning I met my goal of running a 3.1 in under 30 minutes...
Meh, I will go with the official time. Still pretty good in my book. Plus, did you see SEVENTH OUT OF 43!! Pretty good eh???
Last note for this week. I couldn't get my lazy butt out of bed this weekend, and I'm not sure how the next two weeks are going to go before I start AT. I think I'm trying to cram in extra sleep I've lost over the last two semester's and the sleep I'll lose during AT.
I keep telling myself I HAVE to get into high gear again if I want to lose another 10-15 lbs by Cole's birthday, and run that half marathon.
I know I can, I know I can, just need to give myself a break.
I was asked for a picture, not a fan of me in uniform because I always feel fluffier (Dan hates it when I call myself fat, so fluffy is a term he enjoys better).
Have to love self portraits in the bathroom!!
Tuesday, May 15, 2012
Proud Daughter
I'm confident in this time because my average pace was 9:38 (yes I'm shocked also!).
I'm also confident because this morning I ran the same distance in 30:52, and I walked a good .15th of a mile.
Want to know what else is awesome? My Mom walked her first 5k. Which is a pretty amazing accomplishment considering she has to battle fibromyalgia. She wants to do more, and I'm excited for her.
After I finished racing, I walked back to find her and finished the walk with her and my little dude.
It was fun, because my family was there, even my sister and her husband.
I'm looking forward to this weekends race, hoping to accomplish it under 30 minutes. I know this, I won't give up!
On a weight loss note, there hasn't been any. Which is fine with me, I haven't been entirely vigilant on what I eat, but I have maintained my weight still, and that's what's important in the long run.
Thursday, May 10, 2012
Feeling Shameful
Confessional: I have only worked out twice in the last two weeks.
There I said it, I confessed, I've been sort of a lazy bum.
I say sort of because the hubby and I walk a mile every night atleast 5 days a week. We bumped it up to 1.5 miles this week.
Really though, I'm tired.
Tired of being tired.
Tired of getting only maybe 6 hours of sleep to fit in working out, school, work, and time with my family.
Tired of being sore.
Tired of getting up well before the sun starts shining.
Tired of sacrificing my time with family.
Tired of sacrificing time studying.
Don't get me wrong, I still enjoy working out. It is still my release from the stress of life.
I ran 3 times that week after making weight for the military. Last week? I decided I need to focus on closing out the semester well, and getting my head in the game. My grades have suffered while I have killed myself to make military weight. It's scary I went from being on the Deans list in College with a 3.6 to barely grasping onto a 3.0. Not all of it has been the weight loss journey, it did start with the military wanting to deploy me, but the man upstairs had different plans.
I find that I'm enjoying getting 7-8 hours of sleep, I don't feel so foggy headed all the time. I ran on Tuesday, and really enjoyed it.
This morning I was supposed to run with a friend, but I bailed because it was windy. Half-assed a P90X workout.
I think the 5K will refocus my mind.
I hope so anyways.
I'm hoping after being a week past the semester I will feel more rested, and more apt to get out of bed.
FYI: I've maintained my weight at 209-210, so obviously I learned something in my journey. I'm not gorging myself. I just know I will be happier when I lose ~20 more lbs. Which should be easier for me, because it's FOR ME!
I will refocus, may just take me longer.
Monday, April 23, 2012
Confessions and Inspirations
Lets face it I'm not really good at the self taking pictures in the mirror, specially with my iPhone. I did it better with the droid.
I definitely feel smaller than before, and the interesting part is I never thought I would be one of those people who could wear leggings, but I am. So much more comfy and cooler than the jeans I've always worn.
Unfortunately I did not weigh myself this morning, I kind of just rolled out of bed and went for a run. I have found that now I'm at military standards, I don't feel the need to weigh myself all the time anymore. It's a freeing feeling really.
I will admit that for the next 3 weeks,that the weight loss thing is going to take a backseat to school. Hope this isn't a disappointment to anyone. I will however, continue to run 3 times a week and go for my nightly walks with the hubby, and maintain the best eating habits as possible. Finals are coming up and I need to not stress on more than one thing right now.
I'll still give you updates, no worries there!
Oh, I signed up for the City of Trees half marathon for October 14th. EEEEEeeeeep!! Scary, but I'm really excited. I have lots of 5K's and a few 10K's planned to prepare. I feel the need to redeem myself, as I signed up for the half marathon a few years ago, and chickened out. Let someone take my place, because I was lazy. That's not going to happen this time.
I do have a few shout outs to a couple of people who are seriously inspiring!
First off my friend Kristina kicked butt this weekend in the Pat Tilman Shadow Run, she took 3rd place!!
Other shout out goes to Evelyn who has lost 81.6 lbs in less than a year! She is truly an inspiration.
Both ladies are pretty darn inspiring, and it's good to be surrounded by this awesomeness.
Hope you can find that inspiring person in your life!!
Monday, April 16, 2012
It's Not Easy But It Can Be Done
That's right ladies and gentlemen, I passed Army HT/WT this weekend!
By the skin of my teeth, but I passed!!
Woohoo!! Happy Dance!!!
This weekend was drill and it was the dreaded 100% HT/WT for the company. I went in without a single morsel of food, coffee, or even water. I had a piece of gum to give me a slight sugar boost. Because I had to grade a PT test before getting taped.
It was a glorious feeling to see that "Soldier meets standards" on that little piece of paper. Even though it still says that I'm 42 lbs over the standard weight for my height. Those 2 numbers 34% say I meet the taping standards.
But this does not mean I am done by any means! I still have 15-20 more lbs that I would like to lose. This time it will really be for me and without the stress. I feel like this huge weight has come off my shoulders. This is all for me now!
This last little bit is a shout out for another soldier who used to be in my squad...
You can lose the weight after baby. You may not be at the weight that the Army says, but if you meet the PT and tape standards that is all that is needed. I have been in the military for 13 years and have never been at the standard weight. It's a joke really, and they need to update it.
The weight can come off even with orthopedic, thyroid, and time issues. I am proof that with moderately hard work (cuz I took to many breaks in between) that it can happen. Don't get discouraged, just jump right back in with more vigour if you have a bad day, or if you slip. You can do this!
Oh and I forgot to do weight this morning. Last weigh in Friday was 210.2, a little more than last week but it's probably just water weight.
By the skin of my teeth, but I passed!!
Woohoo!! Happy Dance!!!
This weekend was drill and it was the dreaded 100% HT/WT for the company. I went in without a single morsel of food, coffee, or even water. I had a piece of gum to give me a slight sugar boost. Because I had to grade a PT test before getting taped.
It was a glorious feeling to see that "Soldier meets standards" on that little piece of paper. Even though it still says that I'm 42 lbs over the standard weight for my height. Those 2 numbers 34% say I meet the taping standards.
But this does not mean I am done by any means! I still have 15-20 more lbs that I would like to lose. This time it will really be for me and without the stress. I feel like this huge weight has come off my shoulders. This is all for me now!
This last little bit is a shout out for another soldier who used to be in my squad...
You can lose the weight after baby. You may not be at the weight that the Army says, but if you meet the PT and tape standards that is all that is needed. I have been in the military for 13 years and have never been at the standard weight. It's a joke really, and they need to update it.
The weight can come off even with orthopedic, thyroid, and time issues. I am proof that with moderately hard work (cuz I took to many breaks in between) that it can happen. Don't get discouraged, just jump right back in with more vigour if you have a bad day, or if you slip. You can do this!
Oh and I forgot to do weight this morning. Last weigh in Friday was 210.2, a little more than last week but it's probably just water weight.
Tuesday, April 10, 2012
Startling Revelation
I was pondering yesterday about my pre-Cole weight and I realized I am only a few pounds away from that mark!!
If I remember correctly I was at 205 when I found out I was pregnant, but continued to try to lose weight and got down to 202 before I was put on a profile for the military.
I am about 4 lbs away from pre-pregnancy weight!!! OMG!! I'm hoping the meet that goal by the time Cole is 18 months which is 11 days from now. I'm going to try my hardest.
Yay me!!!
If I remember correctly I was at 205 when I found out I was pregnant, but continued to try to lose weight and got down to 202 before I was put on a profile for the military.
I am about 4 lbs away from pre-pregnancy weight!!! OMG!! I'm hoping the meet that goal by the time Cole is 18 months which is 11 days from now. I'm going to try my hardest.
Yay me!!!
Monday, April 9, 2012
Slowly Coming Along
My weight for this week: 209.0!!! Woooohooo!!
It surprises me a bit because I did not work out AT ALL last week.
Mom says that like anything when your body experiences a change sometimes that helps to bust through a plateau.
If that's true, I'm about to bust through again this week. I'm jumping in with both feet this week and getting back into the swing of things. It will definitely help improve my mood, hubby has noticed more grumpy Missy lately.
My plan is to get in two workouts at least 4 days a week. I will do my normal cardio or running during the day and get in an at home workout in. I realized that the best time for me to do Jillian's 30 day shred or Insanity is right before bed. May not be the best thing for sleeping, but I'm going to try it. There is that time that hubby is doing dishes and everyone else is in bed, so I can get some exercise in. I'm going to try it out this week and see how it goes.
This weekend I have drill and it's the weekend where EVERYONE is getting height/weight measurements. I hate it so bad. The problem i was talking about this morning with a friend of mine is how messed up the body fat taping is. The Army measure's your percentage based on three measurements: your neck, the smallest part of your waist, and the most protruding part of your hips.
It's frigging ridiculous how inaccurate that is. I have a tiny neck, with a hourglass shape....so my tiny neck doesn't give me ANY leeway on my hips. I have Mediterranean, womanly, child-bearing hips. It screws me every time. The only thing that saves me most of the time (but not currently) is I have a decently smallish waist for a woman my size. Flip....it's what I dread with a passion.
I'll let you know next week how everything goes.
It surprises me a bit because I did not work out AT ALL last week.
Mom says that like anything when your body experiences a change sometimes that helps to bust through a plateau.
If that's true, I'm about to bust through again this week. I'm jumping in with both feet this week and getting back into the swing of things. It will definitely help improve my mood, hubby has noticed more grumpy Missy lately.
My plan is to get in two workouts at least 4 days a week. I will do my normal cardio or running during the day and get in an at home workout in. I realized that the best time for me to do Jillian's 30 day shred or Insanity is right before bed. May not be the best thing for sleeping, but I'm going to try it. There is that time that hubby is doing dishes and everyone else is in bed, so I can get some exercise in. I'm going to try it out this week and see how it goes.
This weekend I have drill and it's the weekend where EVERYONE is getting height/weight measurements. I hate it so bad. The problem i was talking about this morning with a friend of mine is how messed up the body fat taping is. The Army measure's your percentage based on three measurements: your neck, the smallest part of your waist, and the most protruding part of your hips.
It's frigging ridiculous how inaccurate that is. I have a tiny neck, with a hourglass shape....so my tiny neck doesn't give me ANY leeway on my hips. I have Mediterranean, womanly, child-bearing hips. It screws me every time. The only thing that saves me most of the time (but not currently) is I have a decently smallish waist for a woman my size. Flip....it's what I dread with a passion.
I'll let you know next week how everything goes.
Wednesday, April 4, 2012
Tired, Disgruntled, Worn Out
My whine-a-thon continues onto this blog.
I have just had up to here (hands over my head) with school.
By the time I graduate in 2014 I will have been in school for 11 years. Ok, so it's not a consistent 11 years but forever nonetheless.
I completed most of 2 semesters Fall 03-Spring04. Came back after Iraq deployment in Fall 06, Spring 07, Fall 07, Spring 08, Fall 08, Spring 09 is where I completed my Associates in Criminal Justice. Fall 09 was mostly a bust because I really only completed 2 classes, because I failed the other because of training for a deployment. Spring 2010 was also a bust because I only completed 1 of 2 classes I signed up for, the online class was easy to complete, but my morning sickness/migraines kicked my butt. Went back to school Spring 11 taking only a couple of classes to find my groove. Completed a crappy Fall 2011, and now in the midst of a crappy Spring 12.
So if I discount the first two semesters, because I retook most of those classes anyways, along with my busted semesters I've been in school for 4 years, 6.5 when I actually complete my degree.
I'm so burnt out though. I feel like it's not getting me anywhere. It's so bad that since we have come back from Spring break I haven't even attended classes yet. I've done some reading and completed assignments, but I just don't flipping care anymore.
I would just be happier being a working Mom right now.
But I CANNOT throw away all that time I have put in. I'm not that type of person.
Oh, and I applied for the Deputy Coroner for Ada County position. I was told that it wouldn't look bad if I did; I have an Associates, have 11+ years of medical experience, combat experience, and military behind me. But I didn't even get a flipping call. Grrrr...
I love my family, my friends that talk to me, and just my regular life; if you subtract the pressure for military weight standards and school.
I love seeing how my son has gotten to be such an independent little man, and how smart he is. He makes everything better when I come home, but when I put him down for bed, reality smacks me in the face.
I know there are much worse things out there I could be dealing with. Don't remind me, I see some of the stuff on the news, the things the soldiers I help deal with, and so much more. But dangit I can complain right!?
There is a light at the end of the tunnel, I just have to find it. Maybe even open my eyes to see it.
I have just had up to here (hands over my head) with school.
By the time I graduate in 2014 I will have been in school for 11 years. Ok, so it's not a consistent 11 years but forever nonetheless.
I completed most of 2 semesters Fall 03-Spring04. Came back after Iraq deployment in Fall 06, Spring 07, Fall 07, Spring 08, Fall 08, Spring 09 is where I completed my Associates in Criminal Justice. Fall 09 was mostly a bust because I really only completed 2 classes, because I failed the other because of training for a deployment. Spring 2010 was also a bust because I only completed 1 of 2 classes I signed up for, the online class was easy to complete, but my morning sickness/migraines kicked my butt. Went back to school Spring 11 taking only a couple of classes to find my groove. Completed a crappy Fall 2011, and now in the midst of a crappy Spring 12.
So if I discount the first two semesters, because I retook most of those classes anyways, along with my busted semesters I've been in school for 4 years, 6.5 when I actually complete my degree.
I'm so burnt out though. I feel like it's not getting me anywhere. It's so bad that since we have come back from Spring break I haven't even attended classes yet. I've done some reading and completed assignments, but I just don't flipping care anymore.
I would just be happier being a working Mom right now.
But I CANNOT throw away all that time I have put in. I'm not that type of person.
Oh, and I applied for the Deputy Coroner for Ada County position. I was told that it wouldn't look bad if I did; I have an Associates, have 11+ years of medical experience, combat experience, and military behind me. But I didn't even get a flipping call. Grrrr...
I love my family, my friends that talk to me, and just my regular life; if you subtract the pressure for military weight standards and school.
I love seeing how my son has gotten to be such an independent little man, and how smart he is. He makes everything better when I come home, but when I put him down for bed, reality smacks me in the face.
I know there are much worse things out there I could be dealing with. Don't remind me, I see some of the stuff on the news, the things the soldiers I help deal with, and so much more. But dangit I can complain right!?
There is a light at the end of the tunnel, I just have to find it. Maybe even open my eyes to see it.
Whiny Alert!
Just a warning, this post is about to be EXTREMELY whiny. Turn back now if you don't care, or don't want to hear it.
I have not worked out since Friday, it's Wednesday. In my defense I have been sick, and I'm not one of those people who can workout while they are sick. I have still done the nightly 20-30 minute walk with my hubby and the dog. Unfortunately, that makes me all sweaty, hot, and winded.
Really? The girl who ran a 5K recently and can run 4 miles?? I hate being sick, I lose all motivation for anything.
Another thing, I haven't gone to class at all this week. Last week was Spring Break, and I think I rather enjoyed that schedule of getting up, working out, working, and then going home.
Want to know what my schedule is like on a typical day???...
Get up at 0445, decide if I want to work out now or later, shower, go to work, change for school, go to school, hit the gym if didn't hit it in the morning, go back to work to shower, then work, then make it home ~515. Have dinner, go for walk, play with my son, put him to bed, watch a show with the hubby, go to bed.
Repeat. Some times I leave work early and go run.
I hate running back and forth from school to work and back again....I just want to work out, work and be home.
The worst part about this is I'm coming up on 13 years in the military on Friday, and it's also hanging over my head if I don't lose this last 2% of body fat, they are going to boot me out.
Part of me doesn't give a darn tootin anymore. I consider myself pretty fit, I can climb 3 or 4 flights of stairs without being winded. I can run 4 miles and not feel like I was hit by a bus. I can pass my Army fitness test. But noooooo...they tell me for my height I must be 166 lbs. Really??? I haven't weighed that since high school. If I were to weigh that much I would look horrid.
The other part of me, the part who has dedicated 13 years of my life is fighting. Fighting what seems to be a losing battle. I've only lost 7 lbs since January. I don't know what to do anymore. I would love to change up my routine, but did you see my schedule. There isn't much room for that, or money for it either.
I'm mostly happy with my body, I would be happier if I could lose about 15-20 more lbs, but at the same time I feel 95% happy with the way I look. Unfortunately, if I want to stay in the military I have to lose about 10 more lbs to make the body fat percentage. June is looming in pretty closely.
I just want to scream.
I have not worked out since Friday, it's Wednesday. In my defense I have been sick, and I'm not one of those people who can workout while they are sick. I have still done the nightly 20-30 minute walk with my hubby and the dog. Unfortunately, that makes me all sweaty, hot, and winded.
Really? The girl who ran a 5K recently and can run 4 miles?? I hate being sick, I lose all motivation for anything.
Another thing, I haven't gone to class at all this week. Last week was Spring Break, and I think I rather enjoyed that schedule of getting up, working out, working, and then going home.
Want to know what my schedule is like on a typical day???...
Get up at 0445, decide if I want to work out now or later, shower, go to work, change for school, go to school, hit the gym if didn't hit it in the morning, go back to work to shower, then work, then make it home ~515. Have dinner, go for walk, play with my son, put him to bed, watch a show with the hubby, go to bed.
Repeat. Some times I leave work early and go run.
I hate running back and forth from school to work and back again....I just want to work out, work and be home.
The worst part about this is I'm coming up on 13 years in the military on Friday, and it's also hanging over my head if I don't lose this last 2% of body fat, they are going to boot me out.
Part of me doesn't give a darn tootin anymore. I consider myself pretty fit, I can climb 3 or 4 flights of stairs without being winded. I can run 4 miles and not feel like I was hit by a bus. I can pass my Army fitness test. But noooooo...they tell me for my height I must be 166 lbs. Really??? I haven't weighed that since high school. If I were to weigh that much I would look horrid.
The other part of me, the part who has dedicated 13 years of my life is fighting. Fighting what seems to be a losing battle. I've only lost 7 lbs since January. I don't know what to do anymore. I would love to change up my routine, but did you see my schedule. There isn't much room for that, or money for it either.
I'm mostly happy with my body, I would be happier if I could lose about 15-20 more lbs, but at the same time I feel 95% happy with the way I look. Unfortunately, if I want to stay in the military I have to lose about 10 more lbs to make the body fat percentage. June is looming in pretty closely.
I just want to scream.
Monday, April 2, 2012
Short and Sweet
I missed last week because I PIGGED out over my anniversary weekend. Thankfully I only gained like half a pound. But I was feeling guilty and decided to not share it with you.
This last week was spring break, I did pretty well. I was down to 210.2 this morning. Unfortunately I have a cold that I can't breathe out of my nose and I feel like I'm in a wind tunnel because my ears are all plugged up. So I'm not sure how well my workouts are going to go for the first couple of days this week. I didn't work out the last 2 days...cept for a 20 minute walk yesterday.
Kind of disappointing....
This last week was spring break, I did pretty well. I was down to 210.2 this morning. Unfortunately I have a cold that I can't breathe out of my nose and I feel like I'm in a wind tunnel because my ears are all plugged up. So I'm not sure how well my workouts are going to go for the first couple of days this week. I didn't work out the last 2 days...cept for a 20 minute walk yesterday.
Kind of disappointing....
Monday, March 19, 2012
I Did It!
See that up there? That's me finishing my first 5K race!! I can't even begin to describe how it amazing it felt to do something like this. Even if I don't look so pretty at the end!!
Granted I have done plenty of Army Physical Fitness tests, but nothing compares to a race on my own!!
Checked the YMCA website this morning and found out that I ran the 5K in 32.44 out of 50 people in my age bracket I was 27th. The time is the one I really care about. My goal is to get that under 30, apparently I wasn't as fast as I thought I was. I think it was because I was to nice in the beginning when there were a lot of people and I was to nice to elbow my way through the first few minutes.
I think the worst part about the whole race was waiting for it to start. We got there about 915 in the morning to get my shirt, my number, and the little ankle thing that tracks your time. They were a bit behind, and so we didn't start running until around 1015 or so. I was anxious and nervous starting the run, but once I got into it I just told me it was just another workout.
We ran on the greenbelt, which is my favorite place to run in the Treasure Valley, so it was beautifully overcast and not raining. Slight breeze, and beautiful view of the river!!
A couple of times throughout the run I got a little choked up because I was thinking "I'm really doing this!" I was happy that I ran the entire thing and didn't walk at all. Surprised my husband a bit when I sprinted the end, because he didn't get the picture I had wanted. Wasn't quite prepared for that.
A funny note, there was a girl that kept coming up next to me and it kept pushing me to run harder. I don't think she was racing me, but the thought in my head was that she was. I kept past her until the last little bit and she kind of just shot right by me.
The other thing I didn't like was doing this by myself. I want to do more and will do them by myself if I have too, but it would be so much better if I had someone to do them with me. I have one, but she is faster than me and will leave me in the dust!! My husband has said that he would like to get into it. We shall see!! It would be nice to have something like this to share with him.
Oh, and I NEED to find a jogging stroller because lil man was cranky and I think if he went with me he would love it!! He loves being out side and being with Momma.
I was really random in this post, I apologize, I'm studying a lot lately and my brain is fried!!
Last note, no weight update this week because I forgot to weigh myself this weekend. Friday I was still at 211.2, so I imagine I'm still the same. I'll check next week!!
Oh...the very last note....I wasn't sore in the slightest! Even ran 4ish miles the next day.
Monday, March 12, 2012
Busting Through My Comfort Zone
I'm still wondering who actually reads these, I know of a few, but those of you who are not my facebook friends you should know I've kicked up my distance to 4 MILES running!!
Yes, that's right you heard (read) it right! I'm now running 4 miles 3 times a week.
I think this helped me bust through my plateau a bit, because this morning the glorious scale read 211.6! Wooo!! I'm super excited for this weight loss, specially since I had chocolate cake AND ice cream last night. Ooops, have to chose one or the other on dessert night.
In other news, my 5K race is this weekend, and I'm super excited! I can't wait to blog about it this week, and have another weight loss to report!
Yes, that's right you heard (read) it right! I'm now running 4 miles 3 times a week.
I think this helped me bust through my plateau a bit, because this morning the glorious scale read 211.6! Wooo!! I'm super excited for this weight loss, specially since I had chocolate cake AND ice cream last night. Ooops, have to chose one or the other on dessert night.
In other news, my 5K race is this weekend, and I'm super excited! I can't wait to blog about it this week, and have another weight loss to report!
Monday, March 5, 2012
In Shape...Sort of
First off, weigh-in time 213.2. That's slightly up from last week, but I contribute it again to dehydration from this weekend, oh and probably the pizza we had for dinner last night. Can you blame a family where Mom is playing Army, Daddy is all my himself, AND Mommy had to pick up Grandma and Grandpa from the airport. Quick and easy.
This weekend also brought on a surprise Army Physical Fitness Test. Woohoo!! (ok not so much)
We found out on Wednesday so I skipped my workouts on Friday and Sat for rest.
It was just a diagnostic, so it didn't count for anything other than just a measure of where our fitness was.
I was not feeling so hot yesterday morning, so it was not my best effort. I did my push-ups to the minimum amount needed, followed by a few additional girly ones to make myself feel better. I missed my sit-ups by two, which is pretty lame. My run I made it with only 1 second to spare.
I am using excuses, because I am that person. I wasn't feeling well, so I was not at my optimal performance. The real thing is this; THE PT MONSTER. I'm stealing this from another soldier.
The PT monster is that little ugly dude that sits on your shoulder when a APFT comes up, even though you have been running your somewhat large butt off, that tells you that you are worthless and can't pass. It's there every time I do a PT test. Sometimes it makes my heart race, sometimes it makes me lose my protein bar or shake prior to the even, and sometimes it just makes me shake uncontrollably.
I hate it and I can never figure out how to make it go away. I thought running consistently like I have been would make it go away, but it didn't.
It's my little demon that kicks my butt every time we do a PT test.
This weekend also brought on a surprise Army Physical Fitness Test. Woohoo!! (ok not so much)
We found out on Wednesday so I skipped my workouts on Friday and Sat for rest.
It was just a diagnostic, so it didn't count for anything other than just a measure of where our fitness was.
I was not feeling so hot yesterday morning, so it was not my best effort. I did my push-ups to the minimum amount needed, followed by a few additional girly ones to make myself feel better. I missed my sit-ups by two, which is pretty lame. My run I made it with only 1 second to spare.
I am using excuses, because I am that person. I wasn't feeling well, so I was not at my optimal performance. The real thing is this; THE PT MONSTER. I'm stealing this from another soldier.
The PT monster is that little ugly dude that sits on your shoulder when a APFT comes up, even though you have been running your somewhat large butt off, that tells you that you are worthless and can't pass. It's there every time I do a PT test. Sometimes it makes my heart race, sometimes it makes me lose my protein bar or shake prior to the even, and sometimes it just makes me shake uncontrollably.
I hate it and I can never figure out how to make it go away. I thought running consistently like I have been would make it go away, but it didn't.
It's my little demon that kicks my butt every time we do a PT test.
Monday, February 27, 2012
Why do Weigh-ins Happen on Mondays
To answer my own question: Keep me accountable for the mistakes I make or might make on the weekends.
Dang it, last Monday I was at 213.0 and on Friday I was at 212.2, then the weekend happened.
This morning....215.1. Fluffer Nutter!! I hate that!!
Stupid Mexican food and Applebees this weekend!! I thought I was careful and watched my portions, even skipped on out the tortillas for my Carne Asada. But alas, my favorite, chips and salsa was probably my downfall. Also, as my friend Kari pointed out to me, the dang salt too. Plus I never drink as much water on the weekends as I do during the weekdays.
Bet you tomorrow I'll be back to my 213.
Dang.
Better luck next week.
Dang it, last Monday I was at 213.0 and on Friday I was at 212.2, then the weekend happened.
This morning....215.1. Fluffer Nutter!! I hate that!!
Stupid Mexican food and Applebees this weekend!! I thought I was careful and watched my portions, even skipped on out the tortillas for my Carne Asada. But alas, my favorite, chips and salsa was probably my downfall. Also, as my friend Kari pointed out to me, the dang salt too. Plus I never drink as much water on the weekends as I do during the weekdays.
Bet you tomorrow I'll be back to my 213.
Dang.
Better luck next week.
Wednesday, February 22, 2012
To Run a Half Marathon or To Not
I'm sitting on the couch the other day, feeling exhilarated after my 3 mile run, and I was talking to my Mom about Robie Creek. If anyone doesn't know what it is it's the Toughest Race in the Northwest. A couple of my friends were going to do it, but the race registration sells out in literally minutes, and they have a drawing for second chances. It's that freaking popular.
The downside is it's a hard race and people seriously come away with horrendous injuries. I have had a couple of friends who have done it. One of them had three or four of her toenails fall off.
Anyways, back to the couch...
My Mom says that in a couple of years that could be me. I was like heck no! She said did you ever see yourself getting ready for a 5K? I told her yes, I've always wanted to but never found the motivation to do so. She says you never know... Grr...
So I mention it to the hubby and he is like, "Why not?" Aaaaack.
Can I see myself as a runner? Can I really do a half marathon? I have been rolling those thoughts around in my head for the last couple of days.
That brings me to this morning. I'm talking to my friend Kristina and how excited we are about the 5K in March that we are doing, and she mentions doing a half marathon in May. Initially I told her no, then I said give me a month to figure it out.
The more I thought about it, I thought, "Why the heck not??" Problem is with all the stuff I have going on it would be hard to fit in the time to train for one coming up so quick. I remember the City of Trees Half Marathon, that I signed up for a few years ago and never did. I chickened out and gave my number to someone else. I remember the shame I felt for chickening out. I don't want that on my conscious anymore. Plus during the summer I always have more time, and Fall semester won't be so crazy.
That's it, I'm doing that half marathon!!! I can't get out of it now because I'm posting it here and my faithful (few) followers would be disappointed.
So for now I'll do as many 5K's as I can, and train, train, train for my first half marathon.
I leave you with this picture which always makes me laugh:
The downside is it's a hard race and people seriously come away with horrendous injuries. I have had a couple of friends who have done it. One of them had three or four of her toenails fall off.
Anyways, back to the couch...
My Mom says that in a couple of years that could be me. I was like heck no! She said did you ever see yourself getting ready for a 5K? I told her yes, I've always wanted to but never found the motivation to do so. She says you never know... Grr...
So I mention it to the hubby and he is like, "Why not?" Aaaaack.
Can I see myself as a runner? Can I really do a half marathon? I have been rolling those thoughts around in my head for the last couple of days.
That brings me to this morning. I'm talking to my friend Kristina and how excited we are about the 5K in March that we are doing, and she mentions doing a half marathon in May. Initially I told her no, then I said give me a month to figure it out.
The more I thought about it, I thought, "Why the heck not??" Problem is with all the stuff I have going on it would be hard to fit in the time to train for one coming up so quick. I remember the City of Trees Half Marathon, that I signed up for a few years ago and never did. I chickened out and gave my number to someone else. I remember the shame I felt for chickening out. I don't want that on my conscious anymore. Plus during the summer I always have more time, and Fall semester won't be so crazy.
That's it, I'm doing that half marathon!!! I can't get out of it now because I'm posting it here and my faithful (few) followers would be disappointed.
So for now I'll do as many 5K's as I can, and train, train, train for my first half marathon.
I leave you with this picture which always makes me laugh:
Monday, February 20, 2012
Self Loathing
Do you want to know what can ruin the great euphoric accomplished feeling after a workout?
Looking at oneself in the mirror sans clothes.
I went from feeling this big to very small.
Grrrrr!!! Sometimes I really hate what I see in the mirror. I know that this is all my own doing, because I love food and not so much the working out.
Not to sound conceited but I feel that I am a fairly decent looking woman. I have been blessed on my Dad's side of the mediteranean complexion, and dark hair and eyes. I have decent curves that probably took 25+ years for me to accept. I'm a bit above average height, and I am not morbidly obese.
But I have a fluffy middle, tree trunks for thighs, and fat lady arms that I can't disguise often enough. Blech....
I used to loathe my stretch marks, but I recently read this:
Looking at oneself in the mirror sans clothes.
I went from feeling this big to very small.
Grrrrr!!! Sometimes I really hate what I see in the mirror. I know that this is all my own doing, because I love food and not so much the working out.
Not to sound conceited but I feel that I am a fairly decent looking woman. I have been blessed on my Dad's side of the mediteranean complexion, and dark hair and eyes. I have decent curves that probably took 25+ years for me to accept. I'm a bit above average height, and I am not morbidly obese.
But I have a fluffy middle, tree trunks for thighs, and fat lady arms that I can't disguise often enough. Blech....
I used to loathe my stretch marks, but I recently read this:
I hate my body sometimes and other times I'm ok. People who are super skinny never understand the battle us plus size women go through. I had a friend who used to think she had big hips, except she was built like a beapole. I on the other hand will never understand not having curves, but it's a two sided street I guess.
I have to stop looking at myself in the mirror after a workout, ruins my high way to easily.
Running Does a Body Good?
Weigh-in time. 213.0....
That means I only lost 2/10ths of a lb. Really?? It's like I farted and lost that much. Whatever, it's not a gain right?? Plus that included a dinner out to Olive Garden Friday night, and McDonalds for lunch yesterday. I know my balances, even when I don't make the best food choices.
The good news from last week is my 3 mile run I did yesterday. I was thinking it was going to take me 40 minutes because 2.5 miles was taking about 30. But after studying so hard I needed to just let go so I ran, and ran, and ran. I did 3 miles in 33 minutes with just over a quarter a mile of it walking. The only reason I walked was to change the music on my iPhone. I was amazed and felt really good about it!
The even more amazing part is I don't feel horrible sore today, so I think I may attempt that run again!
My goal is to keep my 5K run under 30 minutes, I think I'm well on my way to that!
That means I only lost 2/10ths of a lb. Really?? It's like I farted and lost that much. Whatever, it's not a gain right?? Plus that included a dinner out to Olive Garden Friday night, and McDonalds for lunch yesterday. I know my balances, even when I don't make the best food choices.
The good news from last week is my 3 mile run I did yesterday. I was thinking it was going to take me 40 minutes because 2.5 miles was taking about 30. But after studying so hard I needed to just let go so I ran, and ran, and ran. I did 3 miles in 33 minutes with just over a quarter a mile of it walking. The only reason I walked was to change the music on my iPhone. I was amazed and felt really good about it!
The even more amazing part is I don't feel horrible sore today, so I think I may attempt that run again!
My goal is to keep my 5K run under 30 minutes, I think I'm well on my way to that!
Tuesday, February 14, 2012
Update Time
I finally lost a few pounds!! Three to be exact!! Down to 213.2!! Exciting for me, because I was getting discouraged.
Another encouragement I got this weekend, is getting my body fat percentage measured for the military. I have lost 1% since the last time I got taped in November, which isn't a whole lot, but to me it means I only have 2% to go before I can finally meet the military standards. GO ME!
On a downer note, I didn't make my first weight loss goal of the year. I turned 30 yesterday, and unfortunately I didn't meet the military standards.
I will still strive towards my under 200 goal for my second wedding anniversary. That is 6 weeks from now so if I lose ~2-3 lbs a week, I should make it. If I do that, then I should meet the military standards by April drill.
Here is to wishing and hoping.
I came up with a weight loss tip that might work when eating out with my family. I'm going to order my usual meal, but share it with my lil man. This will not only cut down on cost for food, so we don't have to get him something separate, I will also cut down my consumption. Eating out this week at Olive Garden, and will do my best to not overdo it!
Another encouragement I got this weekend, is getting my body fat percentage measured for the military. I have lost 1% since the last time I got taped in November, which isn't a whole lot, but to me it means I only have 2% to go before I can finally meet the military standards. GO ME!
On a downer note, I didn't make my first weight loss goal of the year. I turned 30 yesterday, and unfortunately I didn't meet the military standards.
I will still strive towards my under 200 goal for my second wedding anniversary. That is 6 weeks from now so if I lose ~2-3 lbs a week, I should make it. If I do that, then I should meet the military standards by April drill.
Here is to wishing and hoping.
I came up with a weight loss tip that might work when eating out with my family. I'm going to order my usual meal, but share it with my lil man. This will not only cut down on cost for food, so we don't have to get him something separate, I will also cut down my consumption. Eating out this week at Olive Garden, and will do my best to not overdo it!
Friday, February 10, 2012
True Love Exists
I have some time before my Anatomy lecture starts, and I have everything done that I had planned for myself this morning, so you get to enjoy a rambling moment from me!
I had anepiphany inspired thought yesterday after seeing my beautiful cousin. I hadn't seen her since before my lil man was born and a lot has happened, so we were catching up.
Without giving a lot of personal information away because it's not my place, I will just mention that she is recently divorced. (sorry cuz hope this is ok)
This got me thinking about the relationships in our family. Some of them have found their true love the first time, and then there are parts of our family that it took them a second chance. Divorce is high in this country, but sometimes we make mistakes, it happens, and I don't look down on anybody for it. But as our family proves is that true love exists, sometimes it takes more than one try.
I'm hoping that I wasn't sounding preachy, I just wanted to point out the thought that sometimes it takes more than one try to find the right one.
I had another train of thought yesterday from the same conversation.
I think that every girl needs to feel like a princess, and that the man (or woman) that they are with should put them first and treat them as they should be treated. I find it sad that it's a concept that not every girl gets to experience, from personal experience I did not get that either. It wasn't until I met Dan that I realized my worth, and that I'm beautiful no matter how 'fluffy' I get, and that I'm loved no matter how neurotic I'm being. It's the best feeling, and no one should go without it.
That's all for the rambling for now!
I had an
Without giving a lot of personal information away because it's not my place, I will just mention that she is recently divorced. (sorry cuz hope this is ok)
This got me thinking about the relationships in our family. Some of them have found their true love the first time, and then there are parts of our family that it took them a second chance. Divorce is high in this country, but sometimes we make mistakes, it happens, and I don't look down on anybody for it. But as our family proves is that true love exists, sometimes it takes more than one try.
I'm hoping that I wasn't sounding preachy, I just wanted to point out the thought that sometimes it takes more than one try to find the right one.
I had another train of thought yesterday from the same conversation.
I think that every girl needs to feel like a princess, and that the man (or woman) that they are with should put them first and treat them as they should be treated. I find it sad that it's a concept that not every girl gets to experience, from personal experience I did not get that either. It wasn't until I met Dan that I realized my worth, and that I'm beautiful no matter how 'fluffy' I get, and that I'm loved no matter how neurotic I'm being. It's the best feeling, and no one should go without it.
That's all for the rambling for now!
Tuesday, February 7, 2012
Worrywart to the Max
I hate having medical knowledge, it seriously messes with my head when I really wouldn't want it to.
Sunday night lil man slipped in the tub hitting his head. My heart literally stopped, especially when he did the deep breath, and then nothing for like 30 seconds-1 minute. I freaked calling for someone to come upstairs. Unfortunately that finally freaked him out to start crying and then he wanted nothing to do with me. He wouldn't let Grandma let him go. We finally got him dressed and downstairs, but during this time he had blood come out of his nose. That worried me! I checked his pupil response a zillion times, and watched as he walked around but I still didn't feel reassured that he was ok.
I decided to call our doctor and spoke to a nurse that recommended taking him in. We did and the doctor checked him out and said that a CT was not indicated. I still was worried because all I could think about was the kid in my brother's 1st grade class who had a similar fall on the basketball court and died a few hours later. Or that actress who hit a tree, was fine and then died. It happens all the time, and studying the medical stuff, and reading the books all I can think about is the worst case scenario.
Needless to say when lil man woke me up at 1 a.m., I was ecstatic, didn't even get frustrated when I didn't get back to bed until 230 a.m. Was even more happy to hear him calling Mama at 730 a.m.
I love my lil man with all of my heart and soul, and I couldn't imagine life without him. I hate reading stories on the internet, and hearing the heartache that some parents go through when they lose a child. I scares me so much. I know we can't protect them all the time, and that God has his own plan. Believe me I know! It still scares me to think about it.
On a happier note I would like to say that sometimes I like it when he doesn't fall asleep right away because that means I can sit with him in the rocking chair in the dark and just zone out. I love having his little arms wrapped around my neck and just listening to his lullaby CD. It is seriously the most peaceful time, and I love it!
This is why life is a roller coaster, there are the ups and downs and you never know what's going to happen next.
Sunday night lil man slipped in the tub hitting his head. My heart literally stopped, especially when he did the deep breath, and then nothing for like 30 seconds-1 minute. I freaked calling for someone to come upstairs. Unfortunately that finally freaked him out to start crying and then he wanted nothing to do with me. He wouldn't let Grandma let him go. We finally got him dressed and downstairs, but during this time he had blood come out of his nose. That worried me! I checked his pupil response a zillion times, and watched as he walked around but I still didn't feel reassured that he was ok.
I decided to call our doctor and spoke to a nurse that recommended taking him in. We did and the doctor checked him out and said that a CT was not indicated. I still was worried because all I could think about was the kid in my brother's 1st grade class who had a similar fall on the basketball court and died a few hours later. Or that actress who hit a tree, was fine and then died. It happens all the time, and studying the medical stuff, and reading the books all I can think about is the worst case scenario.
Needless to say when lil man woke me up at 1 a.m., I was ecstatic, didn't even get frustrated when I didn't get back to bed until 230 a.m. Was even more happy to hear him calling Mama at 730 a.m.
I love my lil man with all of my heart and soul, and I couldn't imagine life without him. I hate reading stories on the internet, and hearing the heartache that some parents go through when they lose a child. I scares me so much. I know we can't protect them all the time, and that God has his own plan. Believe me I know! It still scares me to think about it.
On a happier note I would like to say that sometimes I like it when he doesn't fall asleep right away because that means I can sit with him in the rocking chair in the dark and just zone out. I love having his little arms wrapped around my neck and just listening to his lullaby CD. It is seriously the most peaceful time, and I love it!
This is why life is a roller coaster, there are the ups and downs and you never know what's going to happen next.
Weight Loss Journey: Take 99?
You can tell when I don't work on Mondays, because I usually don't post my progress until Tuesday. I think I sit here and work trying to avoid work so I figure I will blog. Monday's I'm so focused on homework it usually slips my mind.
I think it's a computer thing, at work I sit at one so I'm always trying to focus on EVERYTHING BUT work. Pinterest, Facebook, the News, my bank account that never seems to be full enough, anything and everything.
Well if you read my last post you know that I had a head cold last week. Started to sneak up on me on Tuesday and smacked me full on in the face Wednesday-Saturday.
I really tried to work out...REALLY!
Wednesday I managed 2 miles on the treadmill and another 20 minutes on the elliptical. But I felt like I had been hit by a bus, and wound up getting sent home by my boss and sleeping for a few hours.
I decided to trade my normal Friday day off of working out for Thursday. I was feeling decent.
Friday I tried running, and I was wheezing 5 minutes in, then I moved to the elliptical. Lasted about 3 minutes there and I felt like I was going to pass out. Finally figured the recumbent bike was better than nothing, 10 minutes later I still felt like I was going to pass out.
Needless to say I decided to take the weekend off and give my body a rest.
I swear to goodness, something else keeps me from getting my workout flow going this week I'm going to go postal!!! I'm 2 for 2 so far, running yesterday and elliptical today. I've got this!!!
No weight loss, but I'm not surprised in the slightest. I'm hoping for next week!
I think it's a computer thing, at work I sit at one so I'm always trying to focus on EVERYTHING BUT work. Pinterest, Facebook, the News, my bank account that never seems to be full enough, anything and everything.
Well if you read my last post you know that I had a head cold last week. Started to sneak up on me on Tuesday and smacked me full on in the face Wednesday-Saturday.
I really tried to work out...REALLY!
Wednesday I managed 2 miles on the treadmill and another 20 minutes on the elliptical. But I felt like I had been hit by a bus, and wound up getting sent home by my boss and sleeping for a few hours.
I decided to trade my normal Friday day off of working out for Thursday. I was feeling decent.
Friday I tried running, and I was wheezing 5 minutes in, then I moved to the elliptical. Lasted about 3 minutes there and I felt like I was going to pass out. Finally figured the recumbent bike was better than nothing, 10 minutes later I still felt like I was going to pass out.
Needless to say I decided to take the weekend off and give my body a rest.
I swear to goodness, something else keeps me from getting my workout flow going this week I'm going to go postal!!! I'm 2 for 2 so far, running yesterday and elliptical today. I've got this!!!
No weight loss, but I'm not surprised in the slightest. I'm hoping for next week!
Thursday, February 2, 2012
Monthly Goals
I feel like I can't catch a break during this weight loss journey.
Last week I mess up my back, this week I get smacked in the face with a cold. Every time I get into a groove something happens to mess it up.
But I will drag myself back into my workout clothes and start it back up again.
I'm doing away with the weekly goals, because I feel like I don't have enough things to change on a weekly basis. I'm sure i could find plenty but there are things i won't change
This month I am determined to loose at least 6 lbs, run 3 miles 3 days a week, and keep up what I goals I have maintained. I'm feeling pretty confident about the 3 miles. I haven't done it yet this month (see above where I mentioned a cold?), but I'm hoping that I will run it in about 40 minutes and shave that down to 30 by months end.
Another thing I'm super excited about?? My beautiful friend Kristina invited me to do a 5K (she wanted 5 miler, I said lets wait til May) with her on St Patty's day. I'm super excited about doing something like this. I just hope that I can keep up with her, she is younger and skinnier.
Anyone else want to rock the 5K???
I have run track and cross country in my younger days, and I've walked a couple of 5K's but I have never signed up to run one. I have some of my inspiration from Evelyn who ran her first 10K this last September.
My goal is to run a 10K come May. I probably won't ever aspire to run a marathon, maybe a half marathon, but we will see how it goes.
Lets raise a glass of water and say cheers to weight loss journeys, however long they take, and whatever curve balls come our way.
Last week I mess up my back, this week I get smacked in the face with a cold. Every time I get into a groove something happens to mess it up.
But I will drag myself back into my workout clothes and start it back up again.
I'm doing away with the weekly goals, because I feel like I don't have enough things to change on a weekly basis. I'm sure i could find plenty but there are things i won't change
This month I am determined to loose at least 6 lbs, run 3 miles 3 days a week, and keep up what I goals I have maintained. I'm feeling pretty confident about the 3 miles. I haven't done it yet this month (see above where I mentioned a cold?), but I'm hoping that I will run it in about 40 minutes and shave that down to 30 by months end.
Another thing I'm super excited about?? My beautiful friend Kristina invited me to do a 5K (she wanted 5 miler, I said lets wait til May) with her on St Patty's day. I'm super excited about doing something like this. I just hope that I can keep up with her, she is younger and skinnier.
Anyone else want to rock the 5K???
I have run track and cross country in my younger days, and I've walked a couple of 5K's but I have never signed up to run one. I have some of my inspiration from Evelyn who ran her first 10K this last September.
My goal is to run a 10K come May. I probably won't ever aspire to run a marathon, maybe a half marathon, but we will see how it goes.
Lets raise a glass of water and say cheers to weight loss journeys, however long they take, and whatever curve balls come our way.
Monday, January 30, 2012
Military Career at Stake
I didn't weigh myself today, I didn't want a blatant reminder that I haven't worked out since last Monday.
I seriously messed up my back last Tuesday, and I found it hard to even pick up my son, or even bend over to pick up his toys. It's better, but not great, so I'm just going to get back into the workout thing and pray that it doesn't act up to bad.
I got a gentle reminder that my year of leeway in not passing weight is approaching in June. For those of you who don't know, to be in the military you have to meet certain physical fitness standards. I can pass my Physical Fitness test, twice actually. I just can't seem to meet the military weight standards. For my height the military says I should weigh 166 lbs. I have NEVER met the weight standards, but seeing how not all of us have Barbie Doll figures they have a body taping system that makes up for that.
Right now I don't meet the taping standards, I have about 20 lbs or so to lose, and about 2-3% body fat to lose in order to make it. If I don't meet the standards I will be processed for a discharge out of the military.
It's very disheartening to know that, come April I will have been in for 13 years, and to get kicked out would be devastating. Loss of benefits, loss of a job, and loss of respect for myself.
You may be asking, well why the heck aren't you trying harder?? I don't know. I feel like I'm giving it 95%, which isn't good enough, but at least I'm trying.
It's very hard for me to live with this hanging over my head. It makes me feel like the NCO that shouldn't get any respect. It's ridiculous.
My goals this week are to get back into working out and increasing my time to 45 minutes of cardio/strength at least 5 days a week. I plan on increasing my run distance to 3 miles come Wednesday the 1st of February. I also am planning on watching my dinner time intake, because that is my weakness. I'm usually starving by then so I eat to much and blow the hard work from the entire day.
Wish me luck. I need to kick this plateau in the Arse!!
I seriously messed up my back last Tuesday, and I found it hard to even pick up my son, or even bend over to pick up his toys. It's better, but not great, so I'm just going to get back into the workout thing and pray that it doesn't act up to bad.
I got a gentle reminder that my year of leeway in not passing weight is approaching in June. For those of you who don't know, to be in the military you have to meet certain physical fitness standards. I can pass my Physical Fitness test, twice actually. I just can't seem to meet the military weight standards. For my height the military says I should weigh 166 lbs. I have NEVER met the weight standards, but seeing how not all of us have Barbie Doll figures they have a body taping system that makes up for that.
Right now I don't meet the taping standards, I have about 20 lbs or so to lose, and about 2-3% body fat to lose in order to make it. If I don't meet the standards I will be processed for a discharge out of the military.
It's very disheartening to know that, come April I will have been in for 13 years, and to get kicked out would be devastating. Loss of benefits, loss of a job, and loss of respect for myself.
You may be asking, well why the heck aren't you trying harder?? I don't know. I feel like I'm giving it 95%, which isn't good enough, but at least I'm trying.
It's very hard for me to live with this hanging over my head. It makes me feel like the NCO that shouldn't get any respect. It's ridiculous.
My goals this week are to get back into working out and increasing my time to 45 minutes of cardio/strength at least 5 days a week. I plan on increasing my run distance to 3 miles come Wednesday the 1st of February. I also am planning on watching my dinner time intake, because that is my weakness. I'm usually starving by then so I eat to much and blow the hard work from the entire day.
Wish me luck. I need to kick this plateau in the Arse!!
Wednesday, January 25, 2012
Down For the Count
I still didn't lose any weight last week. Bummer.
I think it's a portion control thing at dinner and on the weekends. I tend to get out of hand when it comes to dinner because I'm usually starving from watching my portions all day.
Weekends are my nemesis, I find it's easier to workout, but it's not easy eating.
That is my goal this week, maintain portion control.
Unfortunately I tweaked my back yesterday so my workouts this week will probably be nil until it feels better.
Lifting one tiny little suitcase into the back of the car and WHAMO my back pops and I feel searing white hot pain. Needless to say it's not fun trying to tote around 26+ lb son around the house and up the stairs when you can barely stand straight.
It hurts something fierce!
It's better today than it was yesterday, hopefully by the weekend I'll be able to workout again.
I'm getting old!
Good luck to everyone who is on their own weight loss journey.
I think it's a portion control thing at dinner and on the weekends. I tend to get out of hand when it comes to dinner because I'm usually starving from watching my portions all day.
Weekends are my nemesis, I find it's easier to workout, but it's not easy eating.
That is my goal this week, maintain portion control.
Unfortunately I tweaked my back yesterday so my workouts this week will probably be nil until it feels better.
Lifting one tiny little suitcase into the back of the car and WHAMO my back pops and I feel searing white hot pain. Needless to say it's not fun trying to tote around 26+ lb son around the house and up the stairs when you can barely stand straight.
It hurts something fierce!
It's better today than it was yesterday, hopefully by the weekend I'll be able to workout again.
I'm getting old!
Good luck to everyone who is on their own weight loss journey.
Thursday, January 19, 2012
Eating is my Nemisis
This is totally going to be a whiny and complaint filled post.
First, I am glad that it snowed because we needed the moisture.
But it sucks because I couldn't run outside today and I HATE RUNNING ON THE TREADMILL!! Time goes by so much faster when I run in my neighborhood. I tune out the world a lot better when I have scenery rather than the fugly guys at the gym and the TV.
Second, I hate monitoring my calorie intake.
The last three months have been glorious eating whatever and working out, helped me maintain my weight.
Now I'm trying to lose weight again, I am reminded how much I hate monitoring my food intake.
My problem is by the middle of the day I start getting hungry, which leads to a headache, and 85% of the time leads to nausea.
I eat 6 small meals a day, and I make sure I have protein with each meal (because the healthy gods have determined that protein helps you feel full longer). Well that doesn't work.
An example..... One of my favorite snacks is a piece of fruit and some cheese, anther is fruit and peanut butter. I eat it and I kid you not 30 minutes later I'm hungry again. I try to ignore it and chug water. What happens??? Headache worsens and stomach gets crampy.
Case in point, yesterday morning I was waiting for my 2 meal and I got so nauseous I actually thought I was going to throw up, and it had only been 2.5 hours since I had eaten last.
I'm at a loss as to what I do. I get ridiculously grumpy and feel like crap. I went to bed at 8 last night because I felt like crap and I didn't want to eat anything because I didn't wait to break the no food past 7 rule. :(
First, I am glad that it snowed because we needed the moisture.
But it sucks because I couldn't run outside today and I HATE RUNNING ON THE TREADMILL!! Time goes by so much faster when I run in my neighborhood. I tune out the world a lot better when I have scenery rather than the fugly guys at the gym and the TV.
Second, I hate monitoring my calorie intake.
The last three months have been glorious eating whatever and working out, helped me maintain my weight.
Now I'm trying to lose weight again, I am reminded how much I hate monitoring my food intake.
My problem is by the middle of the day I start getting hungry, which leads to a headache, and 85% of the time leads to nausea.
I eat 6 small meals a day, and I make sure I have protein with each meal (because the healthy gods have determined that protein helps you feel full longer). Well that doesn't work.
An example..... One of my favorite snacks is a piece of fruit and some cheese, anther is fruit and peanut butter. I eat it and I kid you not 30 minutes later I'm hungry again. I try to ignore it and chug water. What happens??? Headache worsens and stomach gets crampy.
Case in point, yesterday morning I was waiting for my 2 meal and I got so nauseous I actually thought I was going to throw up, and it had only been 2.5 hours since I had eaten last.
I'm at a loss as to what I do. I get ridiculously grumpy and feel like crap. I went to bed at 8 last night because I felt like crap and I didn't want to eat anything because I didn't wait to break the no food past 7 rule. :(
Tuesday, January 17, 2012
Seventeen and a Half Mile and Counting
I have discovered a new love like for running. I have logged 17.5 miles in since the 1st of the year and I feel like I have accomplished something. My plan is to stick to 2.5 miles for January and increase it by half a mile every month. I haven't had to much of my usual shin splint pain, except this morning. It worries me a bit, but I will keep on trucking and hopefully it doesn't get worse.
I got up at 430 this morning to run in my neighborhood, much to my husbands disappointment. It was hard to get my body moving this morning, and it was colder without the sunshine. But it's nice that I have my workout, minus the strength workout, done for the day. My husband doesn't like that I run in the dark, but I had my reflective belt and didn't have both ear buds in, just in case. Poor guy worries about me to much, but I love that he does.
I again did not lose any weight, but I'm maintaining the 216 lbs, so I guess I should be happy I'm not gaining weight. I know that it's my eating, and that is the hardest thing for me sometimes. This weeks goals are to lessen the amount of processed sugar, and to not eat after 7, except for a dessert nights once a week.
I'm just going to keep on keeping on and try my hardest to not give up. My military career depends on it.
I got up at 430 this morning to run in my neighborhood, much to my husbands disappointment. It was hard to get my body moving this morning, and it was colder without the sunshine. But it's nice that I have my workout, minus the strength workout, done for the day. My husband doesn't like that I run in the dark, but I had my reflective belt and didn't have both ear buds in, just in case. Poor guy worries about me to much, but I love that he does.
I again did not lose any weight, but I'm maintaining the 216 lbs, so I guess I should be happy I'm not gaining weight. I know that it's my eating, and that is the hardest thing for me sometimes. This weeks goals are to lessen the amount of processed sugar, and to not eat after 7, except for a dessert nights once a week.
I'm just going to keep on keeping on and try my hardest to not give up. My military career depends on it.
Friday, January 13, 2012
Running Is Getting Better
I realized something pretty awesome today. For the last two weeks I have been running 2.5 miles three times a week!
So my monthly goals will increase a half a mile at the beginning of the month. This should enable me to be able to run a 5K come May pretty easily.
Maybe even a half marathon in the fall? Hmmmmmmmmm
Anyone have a team I can join for the Susan B Komen Race for the Cure?
So my monthly goals will increase a half a mile at the beginning of the month. This should enable me to be able to run a 5K come May pretty easily.
Maybe even a half marathon in the fall? Hmmmmmmmmm
Anyone have a team I can join for the Susan B Komen Race for the Cure?
Thursday, January 12, 2012
School Hard
Life has been good since fall semester ended in December. I have been able to go to work do my work, goof off 25% of the time, and then go home and enjoy my family. It's been FANTASTIC!
Not worrying about having to work on school, worry about how much time I spend with my lil man, enjoying movie nights with the hubby, and cleaning my house all at the same time instead of certain areas every weekend or so.
I have also been able to cook, and cook a lot! My Dad and Mom do most of the cooking because I don't get home until 530, so instead of having to cook, they let me enjoy time with my lil man. It's been a godsend having them live with us.
This is all coming to an end next week, when the semester starts. I embark on part two of my A&P class and my dreaded Organic Chemistry class. I keep telling myself that I survived last semester, so I will this semester too. Right?? We will see, here is wishing me luck.
Not worrying about having to work on school, worry about how much time I spend with my lil man, enjoying movie nights with the hubby, and cleaning my house all at the same time instead of certain areas every weekend or so.
I have also been able to cook, and cook a lot! My Dad and Mom do most of the cooking because I don't get home until 530, so instead of having to cook, they let me enjoy time with my lil man. It's been a godsend having them live with us.
This is all coming to an end next week, when the semester starts. I embark on part two of my A&P class and my dreaded Organic Chemistry class. I keep telling myself that I survived last semester, so I will this semester too. Right?? We will see, here is wishing me luck.
Tuesday, January 10, 2012
Scale Junky
Scale junky [skeyl juhng-kee] noun
1. One that weighs self on a daily basis, hoping miracles of all miracles happen and 20 lbs dropped from the day before.
I Melissa Sue Spencer, am a Scale Junky.
Ok maybe a reformed scale junky. Last year I would weigh myself on daily basis until I made the hubby hide the scale. Now, I just weigh myself on days that I either feel fat or unusually skinny. Should be everyday on the fat side, but some days I don't care.
Sunday I was feeling unusually fat, so I weighed before I went to drill, and it read 219.0! Really after busting my ass all week I gained three pounds. WTF!!! This morning I weighed myself again, hoping to feel better about myself and it read 216.8.
So I lost nothing last week, but it's probably because I still am not eating TOTALLY right. I'm still having problems resisting an Oreo cookie here and there or other things that still linger in the house. I'm working it, truly, I just love to eat like a fat kid.
I did make my goal of 5 days a week working out, and I will continue to do so.
I am still working on the eating slower, I did pretty good last week, but there were a couple of times either because I was really hungry or really liked what I was eating that I wolfed it down. I eat way to fast sometimes.
This weeks goals are:
1. To not let more than 1 day lapse between workouts. I know that I need to take time off, but I once read somewhere that you should only have one day of rest, and no more. I pretty much did that last week, but I need to continue with it.
2. I really only did cardio last week because it's easiest and more convenient for me to do, I hate strength training. My goal is to throw in the strength training.
Here is to week two of 2012.
1. One that weighs self on a daily basis, hoping miracles of all miracles happen and 20 lbs dropped from the day before.
I Melissa Sue Spencer, am a Scale Junky.
Ok maybe a reformed scale junky. Last year I would weigh myself on daily basis until I made the hubby hide the scale. Now, I just weigh myself on days that I either feel fat or unusually skinny. Should be everyday on the fat side, but some days I don't care.
Sunday I was feeling unusually fat, so I weighed before I went to drill, and it read 219.0! Really after busting my ass all week I gained three pounds. WTF!!! This morning I weighed myself again, hoping to feel better about myself and it read 216.8.
So I lost nothing last week, but it's probably because I still am not eating TOTALLY right. I'm still having problems resisting an Oreo cookie here and there or other things that still linger in the house. I'm working it, truly, I just love to eat like a fat kid.
I did make my goal of 5 days a week working out, and I will continue to do so.
I am still working on the eating slower, I did pretty good last week, but there were a couple of times either because I was really hungry or really liked what I was eating that I wolfed it down. I eat way to fast sometimes.
This weeks goals are:
1. To not let more than 1 day lapse between workouts. I know that I need to take time off, but I once read somewhere that you should only have one day of rest, and no more. I pretty much did that last week, but I need to continue with it.
2. I really only did cardio last week because it's easiest and more convenient for me to do, I hate strength training. My goal is to throw in the strength training.
Here is to week two of 2012.
Wednesday, January 4, 2012
Random Thoughts on Working Out/Being Healthy
This is just going to be me randomly putting my thoughts out there.
First thought: They recommend at least eight 8oz glasses of water a day to be healthy. I think it's just a way to keep you getting up and down off your butt to go to the bathroom and get more water. I am constantly up and down getting water or peeing!!
Second thought: I love working out now (biggest problem is time and convenience but that's another blog). I also love/hate the sore muscles you have afterwards. I love it because you know you did a good job and made a difference. I hate being sore.
Anyone else agree with me on this?
That's all!!
First thought: They recommend at least eight 8oz glasses of water a day to be healthy. I think it's just a way to keep you getting up and down off your butt to go to the bathroom and get more water. I am constantly up and down getting water or peeing!!
Second thought: I love working out now (biggest problem is time and convenience but that's another blog). I also love/hate the sore muscles you have afterwards. I love it because you know you did a good job and made a difference. I hate being sore.
Anyone else agree with me on this?
That's all!!
Tuesday, January 3, 2012
Happy New Year!!
Wowzer!! October...it's been awhile since I've been on here. Whoops!!
I've been inspired by Evelyn to restart talking about my weight loss progress.
Lets just say I didn't fall off the workout wagon. I continued (until three weeks ago) workout out 4-5 days a week, but I wasn't so vigilant on my eating.
What's my weight now? 216.4 as of yesterday morning, so that's only about a 4 lb weight gain.
My official tally for last year was 23 lbs lost. It doesn't seem like a whole lot, but I realized that I lost it and kept it off and that's the most important part.
I took a workout sabbatical after school got out, it was only supposed to be only two weeks, but the stomach bug hit our house HARD last week so it was difficult to find time or energy to workout.
I have a new plan this year, not as a resolution but to just get healthier and make weight so I don't kicked out of the military. To kick start it this year I'm going to make 2 small changes a week, instead of just straight changing all the bad habits I've rediscovered over the last couple of months. Small goals that I can incorporate and hopefully make them last.
This weeks goals are to go back to working out at least 5 days a week at a minimum of 30 minutes, and eat slower to allow myself to feel full.
Yesterdays running was awesome, the weather wasn't to cold so it was enjoyable. I ran/walked for about 40 minutes. I think I did ok with eating slower, even left food on my plate!!
My goals for the year are:
1) Make my military weight by my 30th birthday. (February 13th, 2012).
2) Finally make it under the 200 lb mark by my 2nd Wedding Anniversary. (March 27th, 2012).
3) Toss around the idea of running at least a 5K this year. (any takers to do this with me?)
4) Score higher than 210 on my PT test this year.
5) Be at a comfortable weight by Cole's 2nd Birthday, whatever that may be. (October 21st, 2010).
They are not lofty goals, just attainable. We will see how it goes. Wish me luck!!
I've been inspired by Evelyn to restart talking about my weight loss progress.
Lets just say I didn't fall off the workout wagon. I continued (until three weeks ago) workout out 4-5 days a week, but I wasn't so vigilant on my eating.
What's my weight now? 216.4 as of yesterday morning, so that's only about a 4 lb weight gain.
My official tally for last year was 23 lbs lost. It doesn't seem like a whole lot, but I realized that I lost it and kept it off and that's the most important part.
I took a workout sabbatical after school got out, it was only supposed to be only two weeks, but the stomach bug hit our house HARD last week so it was difficult to find time or energy to workout.
I have a new plan this year, not as a resolution but to just get healthier and make weight so I don't kicked out of the military. To kick start it this year I'm going to make 2 small changes a week, instead of just straight changing all the bad habits I've rediscovered over the last couple of months. Small goals that I can incorporate and hopefully make them last.
This weeks goals are to go back to working out at least 5 days a week at a minimum of 30 minutes, and eat slower to allow myself to feel full.
Yesterdays running was awesome, the weather wasn't to cold so it was enjoyable. I ran/walked for about 40 minutes. I think I did ok with eating slower, even left food on my plate!!
My goals for the year are:
1) Make my military weight by my 30th birthday. (February 13th, 2012).
2) Finally make it under the 200 lb mark by my 2nd Wedding Anniversary. (March 27th, 2012).
3) Toss around the idea of running at least a 5K this year. (any takers to do this with me?)
4) Score higher than 210 on my PT test this year.
5) Be at a comfortable weight by Cole's 2nd Birthday, whatever that may be. (October 21st, 2010).
They are not lofty goals, just attainable. We will see how it goes. Wish me luck!!
New Year, New Possibilities
It's officially 2012, and I have realized I have severely neglected my blog. Is anyone still reading this? ...... Anyone???
Oh well, I'm still going to use this as an outlet of what's going on in my head, which is pretty scary sometimes.
What's happened since October??? I passed O Chem by the skin of my teeth! I also got a C in Anatomy, but it's because I put so much effort into O Chem, and it was worth it. I did get a B in O Chem lab, and an A in my Nonfiction Writing class. All in all not one of my finer semesters but definitely not my worst (can we say first semester best grade a C?).
My Dad got disability so he is officially retired. It's a good thing because he feels like he is contributing to the family, and is getting paid to watch his grandson. Dad's health is questionable at times, but we take it one day at a time. We have to deal with some major things in the future, and I'm worried. I'm there for my Mom and Dad, and that's all that matters right now.
My brothers are doing fairly decent. There is some stuff that is not appropriate for the blogosphere, but we will just leave it as people aren't always forthcoming about who they are. I love my brothers and I am here for them. As evidenced by taking in my younger brother's two dogs for a time. It's made life a lot crazier at times, but knowing that my brother doesn't have to worry about their well being makes me happy.
I recently lost a best friend, not in the other worldy sense, but in the dropped off their friends list. I'm not entirely sure what happened, but I know I wasn't the best in keeping in contact. It's not entirely my fault I know that, but it's for the best. It wasn't the best relationship for the last couple of years.
All my friends returned home from their deployment, and safely I might add. It's nice to know that they are home now, even if I don't get to see them a whole lot.
My goals for 2012:
1) To just let things roll. I dwell on things to much sometimes, and I'm tired of it stressing.
2) Survive the 2nd semester of Organic Chemistry
3) Just live life, it's the end of the world on the 21st of December after all
4) Say goodbye to my 20's
5) Lose the last 20-30 lbs
I also hope to blog at least once a week. I know I will never make it everyday, especially with school, but once a week should be sufficient.
Hope everyone enjoyed their holidays! Lets jump in to 2012!
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